How do you pick among ALL of the strange stuff that took place in sports last year? These are in no particular order, except that the first one is one of my favorites, especially since I found this picture of an actual dog head camera from some Eastern European website. 

Cops Strap Camera on Dog's Head to Get Little League Shooter Out of His House - Man in backwoods Michigan town fires several shots near a Little League ballpark where a game is going on. Cops come to arrest him, he pulls a shotgun and barricades himself in his house. Cops send in robot with a camera on it and man destroys it. So, what do the cops do next? They send in--I'm not making this up!--a dog with a camera strapped to his head. Cops see where man is in house and rush in to arrest him. The stand-off ended without a shot being fired. Dog gets Scoobie Snack. Okay, that last part I made up, but it just makes sense, doesn't it? (Detroit Free Press) At right, a dog-head camera like the one we think the cops used, but we're only guessing.

Rabid Raccoon Attacks Golfer on Driving Range - This comes to us from the Palm Beach Florida Police Blotter: "While practicing on the driving range at the North Palm Beach Country Club, a golfer was approached around 6:44 p.m. by a raccoon. The raccoon, which was snarling, approached the golfer, but the golfer hit a golf ball toward the animal, which ran into some nearby bushes. No one was bitten. An officer from Palm Beach County Animal Care & Control captured the raccoon about an hour later. Two days later, the County Health Department confirmed that the raccoon had rabies."

Zamboni Driver Arrested for DUI - This is a first for BadJocks. Of course, we've seen a variety of drunk driving arrests, including one last week for a guy on a golf cart. But we've never heard of someone arrested for DUI on a zamboni! According to our friends at TheSmokingGun.com, John Peragallo, 63 was nailed Sunday for the alleged boozed-up operation of the ice cleaning machine at the Mennen Sports Arena. Apparently, another employee called police after watching Peragallo's reckless operation of the Zamboni, which careened around the ice and nearly smashed into the rink's boards. Peragallo was charged with a misdemeanor drunk driving charge after twice blowing a .12 on a breath test. Not bad, but certainly not good enough to make the BadJocks BAC Rankings. (He'd need to double his efforts.) Read the complete police report here. (Thanks to Dan Luka for the link!)

First Case of Putt Putt Rage? Angry Woman Body Slams 5-Year-Old Girl at Miniature Golf Course - Maybe it was the frustration of not getting the ball past the windmill on the 9th hole. Or maybe it seemed like the laughing clown on the 13th was mocking her. No one knows for sure why, but 40-year-old Darnell Lee Kreuzer of Lake Mary, Florida was arrested over the weekend at T.J.'s Family Fun Center for allegedly slamming young Julia Coelah to the ground because the little girl mad her angry for some reason. According to the 5-year-old, Kreuzer, ". . . picked me up by the leg and grabbed my arm and she picked me up and she threw me and then whacked me with the mini golf thing and I got a big bump on my head." At least one witness claims the woman also swung a club at Julia. In her defense, Kreuzer, who now faces third-degree felony child abuse charges, claims she was just trying to get the girl out of the way of an oncoming golf ball. Yeah, 'cause the ball could have like, hit her foot or something and maybe bounced up and poked her eye out. She's actually a hero! At right, a CSI Miami technician body slams little Julia repeatedly in order to try and solve this baffling crime. (Local 6 News)

Holy Mackerel! Bass Fisherman Accused of Cheating With Precaught Fish! Is nothing sacred anymore? We expect pro athletes to cheat, but pro fisherman? My holidays are ruined now with this story, courtesy of our buddies in Boston Karlson & McKenzie: Paul Tormanen, 39, a Missouri fisherman is accused of cheating in a professional bass tournament in Louisiana last week. How? According to reports, another competitor found bass tied to a tree before the tournament started. Rather than just remove the fish, authorities marked them (how do you mark a fish?) and then waited at the scales. At the end of the tournament, Tormanen showed up with one of the marked fish at the Bassmaster Tournament on the Red River. He now faces a felony charge of contest fraud. (WNBC)

Teenager Cons NFL Players Out of Hundreds of Dollars in Phone Scam - If a stranger called you out of the blue and claimed to be a former teammate down on his luck, would you wire him hundreds of dollars . . . to a grocery store? Well, at least two current or former NFL stars did, before Warren Sapp got suspicious and called police. Lewis Sills, 19, of Elkridge, Maryland faces multiple charges of identity theft after stealing from Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb and former Washington Redskins cornerback Darrell Green. Somehow, Sills got the home phone numbers of the players and called them claiming to be either a former teammate or a player on another team and asked the jocks to wire money ($900 in Green's case and $600 in McNabb's) to a grocery store. In Green's case, he claimed to be Baltimore Ravens linebacker Peter Boulware and that he had a "cousin" named Lewis Sills who would sign for the money so it should be sent in his name. The scam worked both times but when he tired to tap the Raider's Sapp for $1800 (gettin' greedy), the All-Pro lineman called cops who were waiting when Sills went to pick up the cash. Police believe other current and former NFL stars may also have been targeted by the scam but aren't sure how many fell for it.

New Addition to the BAC Rankings? ESPN Writer Arrested in Indy Pace Car, Has to Be Tasered By Cops - We might just give an honorable mention listing to ESPN contributor Bruce Martin who was arrested by Indianapolis cops earlier this week for DUI. Martin blew an impressive .22% BAC, just below what is required to make the current BAC Rankings. However, Martin wasn't just tooling around Indy in an old Buick: he had been loaned one of the bright yellow 2005 Chevy SSR Pace Cars used for this year’s Indy 500 and the Month of May festivities. So when cops saw it weaving down the street at 3 am, it wasn't hard to follow. Their report says at one point, Martin's car was dragging one of its front tires underneath it with sparks flying. But the fun didn't end there: after the nearly two-mile pursuit Martin refused to get out of the car, so a deputy had to break out a window and used a taser on him. I think that's worth an Honorable Mention, don't you? More

From the BadJocks' "We're Not Making This Up" Files: Canadian College Professor to Study Why Women Flash Their Breasts at Hockey Games - It's a question we've all wanted to ask, but didn't because we were afraid it would stop, right? Professor Mary Valentich, of the University of Calgary's Faculty of Social Work, is going to study why women flashed crowds of Calgary Flames fans during last year's NHL playoffs. She thinks it will shed light on current Canadian attitudes about female nudity, adding a scholarly, "There are gender role issues here. These women are doing something unconventional and yet they're using the traditional sexual route to express whatever they're expressing." In an unrelated story, the University of Calgary's School of Social Work has received 4,000 applications for graduate assistant positions since you started reading this article. (Thanks to Fark.com for the link!) Professor Valentich may be able to do some research at the official FlamesCentral website which has this Not Safe for Work gallery.

Surprise! HS Wrestling Team's No-Holds Barred "Brawl Day" Pitting Coaches Against Students Gets Out of Hand - At Punahou High School in Hawaii the wrestling coach decided to have a practice session he called "Brawl Day" where the coaches themselves would take on the young grapplers in an effort to allegedly help them "handle themselves safely during a tough wrestling match." Sure. According to an attorney hired by the family of an injured wrestler, all of the "Brawl Day" matches were "no-holds-barred" competitions, meaning that anything was allowed EXCEPT punching with fists. The attorney, David Gierlach, claimed that one of the assistant coaches Kena Heffernan, a CHAMPION AMATEUR SUMO WRESTLER who stands 6 feet tall and weighs over 250 lbs repeatedly struck his client's face with his forearm and kneed him in the mouth during their friendly one-on-one session while other coaches watched. Gierlach goes on to say that the result was a bloody nose and a cut lip for the boy . . . oh, and Hefferman's firing and the suspension of the head wrestling coach. (The wrestler was 5'8" and under 200 lbs.) Where's Hulk Hogan to teach this guy a lesson?

Headline of the Week: Two Oregon State Football Players Caught Trying to Bribe Cabbie With Pot - There's dumb, and then there's downright stupid, and then there's these two geniuses. Everyone knows if you're going to pay cab drivers with drugs they prefer Ecstasy! Jimtavis Walker and Star Paddock have been charged with assault, robbery, theft of services, harassment and attempted delivery of a controlled substance after attempting to pay a cab driver with marijuana and them stiffing him altogether. According to police, the dimwit duo took a cab early Friday and when they reached their destination they didn't have the cash to pay the $14 fare, so they offered the cabbie some marijuana, but it was refused. Paddock then offered to pay with a credit card, but took it back before the transaction was complete, left the cab, and pushed the driver when he attempted to stop them. (Thanks to Victoria Taft at KPAM for the link!)

HS Baseball Coach Accused of Making His Players Run Naked - It's an update to a story we brought you earlier this summer: the coach of Okayama Sanyo High School in Japan won a national championship this past year, then came allegations the he struck several players and allowed some to smoke, resulting in the school forfeiting the title. Now comes word that the coach also had a unique training method he used to get his players "mentally tough":  he forced them to run laps naked on several occasions. The odd thing is, the principal of the school and other officials knew about this odd behavior but said nothing about it because they thought the player's parents knew and approved. (MSN Mainichi)

Man Claims to Be Related to Michelle Wie Cons Investors Out of 300 Million for Fake Korean Golf Course, Shoe Sterilization Factory - Okay, so it was 300 million Korean wons, but still, it SOUNDS like a lot of money, doesn't it? A man who's last name is Wie and is technically related to golf phenom Michelle Wie, but does not represent her, was arrested this week after telling investors that, “a ‘Michelle Wie golf course’ will be constructed in her hometown of Jangheung, Jeonnam, and we will build a shoe sterilizing factory there, which will give a 940 percent rate of return in just four months.” Why a golf course AND a shoe sterilizing factory? Mr. Wie only knows, but after conning investors for more than a year(?), his ruse was finally uncovered after he started handing out fliers with his picture next to Michelle's . . . and my guess was it was poorly PhotoShopped. (Donga)

Assistant Coach Chokes 18-Year-Old Ref After Close 5th Grade B-Ball Game - Chad Shepherd, a HS senior from Akron, Ohio says after four years of being a referee for the local Catholic Youth Organization league he's used to parents yelling at him and disagreeing with calls, but never expected to be attacked. After a close game between St. Barnabas and Holy Name over the weekend, Craig Glascott, 42, an assistant coach for the St. B's fifth grade team, followed Shepherd out to the parking lot and, after exchanging words, reached into the car and allegedly started choking him. Said Shepherd, "I was scared to death. When he grabbed my neck I choked out and could not get my breath for half a minute." Glascott, who was charged with assault and menacing, also reportedly threatened to kill the young ref before his wife was able to pull him away. (Thanks to John Maczko for the tip!)

Game Over Man! Former Nebraska Football Star Lawrence Phillips Ends Pick-Up Football Game by Driving Car Into Other Players - It's not the first time Lawrence Phillips has been in trouble with the law, and likely won't be the last, but it does appear to be one of the most interesting. According to police, Phillips, who was wanted by police San Diego on a domestic violence charge, somehow ended up in a Los Angeles park with a stolen Honda Accord. There, the 30-year-old joined in a pickup football held by a bunch of teen-aged boys at Exposition Park. At the end of the game, Phillips allegedly became enraged when he could not find several of his possessions and accused the boys of stealing from him. At that point, according to witnesses, Phillips got his car from the parking lot and drove it toward left but came back onto the field behind the wheel of a car and drove it toward the boys, many of whom were able to scatter, but not all got out of the way. Several boys were struck by the car, but none were seriously injured. After Phillips' game of "human bowling" was over, witnesses were able to flag a nearby police cruiser which gave chase and officers arrested him a short time later without a struggle. As many of you already know, Phillips has a history of violent behavior, starting when he was a star player at Nebraska. In 1995, he was charged with trespassing and assault after attacking his college girlfriend, who claims he said he would shoot her in the kneecaps and elbows. (Chicago Sun Times)

The Paddlings Will Continue Until Your Shooting Improves! Back on November 16, coach Thayer L. Williamson's basketball team at 31 Elementary School in Gary, Indiana lost badly, mostly because of poor shooting by the boys. What did Williamson do to correct the problem? Make them run laps? Call an extra practice? Force them to watch "Hoosiers" repeatedly until they hurled? Nope. Williamson took a different route and now faces battery charges for allegedly paddling several of his 13-year-old players after the loss. To add insult to injury for the boys, the alleged corporal punishment came to light after a school nurse examined every boy on the team and 11 of the 12 players still had bruises, welts or swelling on their buttocks the day AFTER the paddling.

Goals Gone Wild? College Newspaper Editor in Trouble After Headline Above Sports Bra Pic Boasts "Four Good Reasons to Support the Team" - We hope you kept your copy of the November 16 issue of the Johnson County Community College (Kansas) newspaper The Campus Ledger because you won't be seeing a cover like this again. According to the school's athletic director, Carl Heinrich, the picture of two female soccer players lifting up their shirts to reveal sports bras reading "Big Johnson Soccer" should not have been printed and reffects badly on women's sports at the school adding, "I don't think it portrays the image of what our athletes are." (Seems to us here at BadJocks that it DOES portray what your athletes are: little attention whores.) The headline "Goals Gone Wild" (a play on the infamous boobie-revealing "Girls Gone Wild" videos) and caption "Four Good Reasons to Support the Team" probably didn't help convince readers that these are a pair of serious, uh . . . sorry, lost my train of thought. Anyway, in his defense, the Ledger's editor in chief, Joshua Seiden, says that "What we believe is appropriate or inappropriate is up to everybody's interpretation," and adds that the two smiling ladies in the picture saw it before it was printed and that neither of them have complained about it. UPDATE:  A helpful student at JCC has identified the girls in the picture at right as Katie Rice (blonde, left,) and Lindsay Wiese (brunette, right.)  (Kansas City Channel - Link includes video clip!) Thanks to long time BadJocks reader Jeremy J. Whetstone for another great link!

School Bus Sex Scandal Bombshell: Girl Allegedly Tells HS B-ball Players "The First One to Drop Your Drawers Get Oral Sex!" - In an update to a story we brought you in December, it turns out that the action experienced during a Texas holiday tournament by HS basketball players was more than an amateur "Girls Gone Wild" video captured on a cell phone camera as previously reported. According to a report in the Fort Worth Star Telegram (registration required) the local sheriff's office is investigating whether sexual assault charges are warranted for students who participated in sex acts on a Trimble Technical High School bus last month. The paper obtained copies of statements that 13 basketball players gave to school officials about what happened Dec. 9 and 10 during a basketball tournament at Granbury High School. The boy's stories vary, but basically tell the tale of three girls from Granbury High flirting with them in the parking lot. At that point, the girls invited the boys to join them on the team bus (ironically, parked in a nearby church parking lot) to "have some fun." Once on the bus, according to the boys, the girls (as young as 16) began daring each other to show their breasts and then dared each other to perform sex acts on the boys. According to one of the 14-year-old Tech players, "Then one girl said, 'The first one to drop your drawers get oral sex first'." Another player told officials that the three girls performed oral sex on "most of the team" and another wrote, "I saw what was happening and so I joined in. But they was not forced by any means. All they did was ask, and they did it." One of the players recorded the sex acts on his cell phone, which was later confiscated by school officials who found out about the incident and launched an investigation. Ultimately, 11 of the Trimble Tech players were sent to an "alternative high school" for 45 days, while the coach, who was supposed to be supervising them at the tournament, got a 1 game suspension. (Thanks to Steven Kirby for the outstanding link!) 

Alabama Girls Basket-Brawl Makes Pacers/Pistons Look Like Picnic: Cheerleader Says Keys, Cell Phones Lost During Struggle - This is one you HAVE to see the video of to believe! (Click on the image at right for the full view, click here for the video.) A girls HS basketball game in Alabama between rival schools, Prattville and Stanhope Elmore had to be canceled after a fight in the upper deck of the stands turned into a near riot. The officers seemed to have the situation  under control by clearing everyone from the deck, until the fighting students from both school got onto the gym floor and started picking up folding chairs to throw at each other. The outnumbered cops then did all they could do and started using Tasers to try to control the crowd. So far at least 11 people have been arrested, with more charges likely to follow. Extra officers were on hand because an incident was expected after earlier confrontations between students at the schools, but no one expected it to get this out of hand. According to Prattville cheerleader Cherish Cartee, "People were screaming and running. Girls lost their cell phones. Keys got lost. It's something I will never forget." Additional video of the brawl can be seen here. (Thanks to the dozen or so people who sent me links to this story!)

Female Student Allegedly Gives Oral Sex "Birthday Present" to High School Hockey Players in Locker Room - Officials at the private Milton Academy in Massachusetts expelled five members of the boy's hockey team for receiving oral sex from a 15-year-old sophomore girl. A school investigation found that the players requested, and received oral sex, from a classmate in a school locker room last month. Rumors are swirling that the sex acts were reportedly performed by the girl as a birthday present for one of the boys. A school spokesperson could not--or would not-confirm that part of the story. So far, none of the boys have been charged with a crime, although several could be charged as adults under MA law, even if the hummers were consensual. In an interesting side note, President Bill Clinton delivered the commencement address at the school two years ago as a favor to a friend whose son was graduating. (Thanks to Bill Donovan for an outstanding link!)

Weiner Whacker Hazing Update: Star HS Quarterback Turns Himself in as Cops Prepare Warrant for His Arrest, May Have Given Frosh "The Shocker" - New details are emerging about the "Weiner Whacker" hazing incident at Donna High School in Texas: after two other senior players were arrested earlier this week, the school's star quarterback, Derick Castillo, turned himself in for his alleged involvement in the hazing of an unknown number of younger players. According to police reports, a gang of seniors took a freshman football player into the school’s locker room showers, held the boy on the ground and slapped his genitals. But the fun doesn't stop there: a probable-cause affidavit for Castillo indicates he and another player tried to pull down the victim’s shorts and put their latex-gloved fingers into his anus.
Earlier: Weiner Whackers? Texas HS Football Players Accused of Slapping Freshman Genitalia - Two football players from Donna High School in Texas were arrested this week after being accused of sexually assaulting freshman football players. According to police, Jacob Leal, 17, and Reynaldo Magallanes, 18, were among a group of senior students who allegedly took freshman players into the locker room showers, where the freshmen suffered hazing involving sexual assault. More specifically, they were accused of "slapping or striking the genitalia of the freshmen." (Thanks to Our Good Friend for the link!)
Weiner Whacker Hazing Update: Town Torn Apart . . . Meanwhile T-Shirts Marking Incident Now on Sale! The small Texas town of Donna has been torn apart by allegations from eight freshman and sophomore varsity football players that they were hazed by upperclassmen who held them down in the locker room, slapped their genitals and put latex-gloved fingers into their anuses. How bad has it gotten? A store at the La Plaza Mall in nearby McAllen now sells a T-shirt that that reads, "Donna Redskins" on the front and "Watch your asses" on the back. (At right, an artist's rending of what that T-shirt might look like.)

Well That Sucks: HS Coach Accused of Licking Bloody Wound of Injured Player - A 34-year-old football coach at Central Linn High School in Oregon has been disciplined for--I'm not making this up--licking the bleeding knee of an athlete. As a result, Scott "Dracula" Reed has been placed on probation and is now required to take a "bloodborne pathogens" course . . . which sound delicious. Reed's pattern of "repeated inappropriate behavior" came to a head after giving his team a pep talk about another coach who licked and healed the wounds of his injured players and then--for some unknown reason--he knelt down and actually licked the boy's knee. At right, a picture of Scott Reed not licking anyone. (Thanks to Mollie Hollibough for the link!)

Drunken Oregon State Football Player Accused of Stealing Gay Sheep - If you ask Beavers player Ben Michael Siegert about the incident, he'll deny it saying, "I'm from a city. I don't know anything about sheep." But according to a Benton County Sheriff's deputy, they found the animal in the back of a pickup driven by Siegart, which was pulled over for speeding late last week. The stolen ram normally doesn't go for car rides with strangers and usually lives a quiet life at the research facility where he's part of a study on--I'm not making this up!-- homosexuality in sheep. At about 200 pounds, the sheriff guesses that it took Siegert and another football player in the truck to get the animal into the bed of the pickup, and added, "I'm sure it wasn't an easy job." Siegert may not actually remember the incident clearly because he was arrested on DUI charge that night and almost an hour and a half after being pulled over he still blew a .14% BAC. (Thanks to Fark.com for the link!)

South African Rugby Fan Shot Through the Penis - The best line from this story reads "Friday night rugby has to change." Ya think? It all started with the Sharks losing to the Hurricanes. Following the match 16 fans were arrested for drunken driving, 40 more were given tickets for speeding, and four were charged with being in possession of drugs when stopped at a nearby roadblock. And then there's the one unlucky fellow with the newly perforated wiener: According to police, two men were being searched for drugs when suddenly one of them broke away and ran. Officers gave chase and when the guy abruptly turned around with a gun in his hand they fired and, according to cops, "the bullet penetrated his penis and came out of his buttocks."

Soccer Game Cancelled After Goalie Hit in Face With Flare! - We've said it before here on BadJocks and we'll say it again: soccer might be dull as hell, but they have the wildest fans of any sport. Here's the latest example: During a European Champions League quarterfinal match between AC Milan cross-town rival Internazionale, Milan's goalkeeper Dida was hit by a flare thrown from the stands after a goal by an Internazionale player was disallowed that would have tied the game and instead the ref awarded AC Milan a penalty kick at the other end of the field. According to league officials, AC Milan was ahead 1-0 when Dida was struck on his left shoulder near his face by the flare in the 73rd minute. The game was stopped for 10 minutes, but when the referee tried to restart play MORE fireworks were thrown and that ended it with 15 minutes left to play. (At right is a photo from the match just minutes before it was called, with several flares on fire on the field in the background.)

Nailed in the Face! 7-Year-Old Hit With Full Water Bottle by Angry Hockey Player - For this story to be truly ironic, the kid would have been hit in the mouth and had several front teeth knocked out. Instead, he just got a nasty welt above one eye. It all started in a minor league hockey playoff game in the AHL between the Philadelphia Phantoms and the Norfolk Admirals. Anton Babchuk, a 20-year-old defenseman for the Admirals, was on the bench being harassed by fans when he decided to throw a full water bottle about nine rows behind him. Instead of hitting a 40-year-old drunk, Babchuk hit young Billy Rouse, Jr. above the left eye, causing the egg-sized welt. Ouch! Not surprisingly, Billy's father, Bill Rouse, Sr. plans to meet with an attorney to decide if he'll press charges. Also not surprisingly, Babchuk has been suspended indefinitely and will likely miss the rest of the season. (Thanks to Kurt Crowley of KACSports.com for the link!)
UPDATE - Attorney for family sends letter to the Admirals asking them to stop trying to contact the boy’s family. Boy has been "traumatized" enough by incident.

Father Suing Boys Who Refuse to Pin His 13-Year-Old Daughter - On the wrestling team, that is. Apparently the novelty of girls wrestling on boy's middle and high school teams has now become a full blown trend that has also spawned a trend of its own: boys from private religious schools who intentionally forfeit matches when they have to wrestle against girls. In fact, the practice has become so commonplace that the father of one girl is prepared to go to court over what he considers a clear-cut case of sex discrimination. Jerry Connors, who's daughter Meaghan is a seventh-grader at McMurray Middle School on Vashon Island, Washington, thinks her Title IX rights (the federal law that prohibits sex discrimination in schools) are being violated when the league honors the boys' requests for a forfeit, adding, "If my religion says that once a year on a full moon, I had to get into a hit-and-run accident, I think the cops would take exception to that. That's an extreme example, but if you come into the public domain, you can't develop a policy that discriminates against people." One expert claims that girls are harmed when they win by forfeit because they lose out on the experience gained in competition, which is at the heart of what sports is about. More

Irish ChampClaims: "Crazy Tyson Bit My Nipple!" - By now, most people know that former heavyweight champ Mike Tyson disgraced himself Saturday night in a fight against Irishman Kevin McBride. After getting knocked around for several rounds, Tyson took a seat and didn't answer the bell for the seventh round. What most of you haven't heard is that--in addition to other dirty tricks he tried to use to win the fight--Iron Mike also allegedly bit McBride's nipple! According to a story in the our favorite UK tabloid, The Sun, McBride told reporters, “He could not get up high enough to bite my ears — good job he wasn’t a midget otherwise he would have bitten something else! He was also trying to bite the thumb of his glove in the ring and I just couldn’t work out what he was trying to achieve by that." The nipple biting caught the 6'6" McBride completely off guard, adding, “I didn’t realize it at first but he had his teeth around it. I just felt a strange sensation and then realized what he’d done." Fortunately for McBride, Tyson wasn't able to "Holyfield" his opponent's nipple, but it wasn't for lack of trying! (At right, a still photo from the fight where Tyson appears to be going for McBride's gusto.) More
BONUS: Tyson sez, "I'm not going to disrespect the sport anymore." Uh, Mike, I think that ship sailed about 1991 . . .